Couples Travel Conundrum: What to Do If You Disagree on the Destination

Avoid the issue of choosing a destination altogether by using a secret-destination U.S. travel service: Pack Up + Go. It may sound crazy to put your hard-earned vacation dollars in someone else's hands, but Pack Up + Go will work with your preferences to create a surprise trip for two that you're both likely to get fond memories out of.

Based on some simple quiz feedback, the service sends you on a three-day trip within the States for $650 to $2,000 per person, via your chosen mode of transportation (flight, train, bus, or road trip). The price tag includes transportation and lodging, as well as a curated list of locally recommended activities based on your likes and dislikes. You won’t find out where you’re headed until the day you leave, so be sure you're both up for a surprise factor.

If you each want to go somewhere the other person doesn’t, consider scrapping the places you disagree on. "But they're our dream destinations," you say? Bear with me.

Want to beach lounge, but your partner wants to hike? Or ready to head for a bustling city, while your significant other wants a quiet getaway? Determine exactly what it is you each love about your pick, and find a destination that offers both.

For example, plenty of affordable Caribbean or South American locales, like Belize and Puerto Rico, have mountains for hiking and beaches for relaxing. Cities with word-class cultural offerings also have relaxing day-trip getaways, like Muir Woods from San Francisco or New Hampshire's White Mountains north of Boston. Agree ahead of time that you'll do your fair share of what the other wants—you might even find it balances out the itinerary and creates a better trip.

Having opposing opinions is healthy and doesn't need to be a source of arguments. Opposites often attract, after all. Look at your travel differences as a fun challenge—who can craft the best itinerary to make the dissenter love the destination? I'll admit I've been wrong about places I've traveled to for both work and pleasure—you never know what it's really like until you're there.

Most places have something for everyone: It is what you make of it. I recently settled a travel disagreement on where to go in Texas when my partner and I agreed we would each choose a spot we wanted to see in the Lone Star State and road trip to both—each of us will have a chance to convince the other why our chosen city rocks more than the other's. Some healthy competition might be just what your trip needs.

While you might not have the money to see both places, agreeing to give each destination a shot at some point is an agreement worth trying. Maybe you won't get to yours right now, or even this year, but making each of your trips happen eventually is a worthy compromise.

Better yet, invoke a new rule on traveling together: Take turns picking the destination. But keep in mind that if you go this route, you should still be willing to accommodate each other along the way. No one wants to go on a trip they had no part in making decisions about, and no one wants the sole responsibility of planning.

I know we're talking about relationships here, but who says you have to give up your dream experience for your partner? If you're not finding a middle ground with your mate, maybe you will with a close friend, family member, or parent. The relationships you have outside your romantic one are just as important. Don't forget about the other options, and tend to your own wanderlust when it's necessary: You might learn something about yourself.